Competitive Mothers of the Metro

'How many tuition-classes does your son attend?' asked a mother of my classmate-to-be while I was inside, giving an admission test to get into one of the finest institutions (as was told to my dad), that the schools in Kolkata have ever bowed down to. The question was however, aimed at my mom. And she replied, with a mild hint of amusement and pride, 'None.. We recently have shifted to Kolkata, so we didn't have time for one anyways. But he's never been in any tuition before..' To her surprise, the reply was met by suppressed laughter and grunts and smiles and apparent sarcasm.

'My son has been training for this admission test for the last 2years.' replied the other woman. She was proud too, utterly eclipsing the similar hint my mom had made for the exact opposite reason!

The other mothers sitting there spoke up, almost synchronized, about the length of time their wards had prepared under a number of teachers from the same school and ex-school teachers.. '1 year!', '2 years!', '3 years!!'

Well, to cut the chase short - most of them got in, yes, but many didn't.. and I was one of the former, though I must say I didn't like it much in there after that.. I considered it a medieval patriarch unwilling to change with time.

Another story.

12 years later. My dad retires to start a second innings to his life. And this time he tries to do it right, to do something he desires and not something he just has to give into. I supported him, and so did mom.. He started giving private tuitions in Physics to the younger students. His favorite subject.

So one fine day in September, one of the students is tensed, she made a few mistakes in the sums and there was no denying that she was facing the half yearly exam blues. But she shuts it up and keeps on with dad.. 'Sir, just 10 minutes more, ask her questions, give her a test, make her get high marks!! Please 10 more minutes!!' said the mom even though it was already 2 hours overtime in dad's schedule..

The mothers in Kolkata (and of 'course in so many other places maybe, too!) have their own competition, their own vendetta and their own personal wars against the mothers of their wards' classmates, or their colleagues in the office or in their husbands' office or her own sister or maybe even the neighborhood mother. They won't let their sons and daughters play, read a storybook, watch meaningful TV for an hour.. It'll be an hour of falling behind and its cumulative effects would apparently destroy the balance of the universe! Or maybe so they uphold..

4:00pm - the kid returns from school, takes bath and has lunch,

5:00pm - the kid goes for swimming lessons,

6:00pm - the kid returns,

6:10pm - singing or dancing teacher arrives,

7:30pm - homework time,

8:30pm - the daily tutor arrives - physics, chemistry, biology and maths,

Some days in the week, the other special only-maths tutor arrives, a 'dada' from down the road who has been in IIT once, much unknown to the fact that another teacher takes the same lessons in the days of the week he doesn't come.. and the other tutor also, apparently knows nothing about the existence of the parallel world of tutors!

10:30pm - dinner, and school next morning. But of 'course the mom makes sure their kid prepares in advance, the chapters to be covered in the classes later that day in school.

"I have many memories of waking up to eat breakfast that my mother carefully prepared for us and her saying, what do y'all want for lunch, and as we're eating lunch, what do y'all want for dinner? It's always about the next meal" - Lisa Loeb

Well, its clear that the mothers in Kolkata have not heard of the idiom, 'All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy!'

I guess in their defense, they'll tell you that there are no 'Jacks' in Kolkata, but a number of young, unpronounceable Bengali names, with mothers who are unmovable in their resolve. To achieve for their sons and daughters nothing short of a well-off establishment. So apparently, its not just dogs that can be house-trained then?

Boy am I glad, my mother has only one resolve, 'Get married by 28!!'

Never gonna happen Ma, never gonna happen..